May 2014


This has been an unusual weekend.....bodywise....and i’m going to have to be really careful. i couldn’t stop worrying about what i was going to look like up on stage. i brought a lot of clothes to choose from....and then felt that nothing fit or looked right.

The black lace over purple dress, even though bat took in the back of it.....too baggy, so i didn’t wear it. Leggings with flowy shirts, not my my stage presence. Tried on a couple more things, too big.

i ended up wearing a fetish top (black with silver zippers) with red bra and my backup black velvet skirt. And then changed into the white boobylicious shirt for the second half of the presentation. That worked out really well.

It was just weird how body conscious i was.

I mean...even going out to breakfast was a challenge. i ended up with leggings and a new shirt from my shopping trip a couple of months ago. But, i had tried on 3 other things before hand, with Dan telling me that the stuff i was trying on was too baggy or looked like pajamas (over-large shirts).

We went to target to buy some Canadian candy, and i ended up spending most of my time in the clothing dept, to see if i could find something that fit. No luck. Didn’t like the styles.

Then, it’s party time. Thank goodness i brought my standby corset and lacey skirt. Nothing else was working for me. So, i wore that for awhile, enjoyed the comments. We went back to our room to get away from the crowd for a little while, and then changed and went back down. i didn’t want to wear my corset again, so stressed over clothing. i ended up with leggings and a tight black top. Together it looked like a catsuit. Dan was happy with it, and i felt awesome in it.

Last night i ended up snacking a lot before bed. That’s not like me anymore. So, now i’m going to have to be careful and make sure that clothing isn’t going to stress me out so much that i attempt to gain the weight back.