Ritual bdsm

Ritual

During lunch today with my boyfriend (btw, it feels funny to call a grown man a boyfriend, but I haven’t found another word that fits)....somehow we got on the subject of pain...I think it’s because we were talking about various surgeries, which lead to pain, which lead to Tops/Doms not liking pain, which lead to me sharing about using pain to fuel rituals. It was a very interesting conversation.

I was explaining how Dan and I use pain in our re-birthing rituals or celebration of hurdles crossed rituals or cathartic rituals. I have had two rituals so far that have used various forms of pain or sexuality as a form of re-birthing.

The first was a rebirthing ritual that involved whale ritual and fisting. We were able to do that at an event called AEON in southern Indiana. I need to find my ritual notes for that that I came across recently. Dan was the Priestess and we had a scribe and a Wiccan Priestess gathered people and created sacred space. This ritual was about letting go of my fathers connection to me/me to him. I can remember Dan being on top of me, fisting me, asking me if I was ready to let go. *shiver* Just remembering that much....so damn powerful.

Then, Dan had a ritual a few years later. That ritual is not for me to talk about. It is his story. But, I can share my piece. He honored me with that chance to help him build the energy for his ritual. Let’s just say it involved rope and needles. To be entrusted with such an important role for my husband and Master. Not something I will forget anytime soon.

Then, the phoenix ritual. Wow! That is another ritual that involved needles. It was a celebration of my growth in various areas of my life. Master putting the feathered needles into my back and i stood naked before everyone, declaring my service to the Goddess. Amazing.

I wonder when it will be time for another major ritual? I don’t feel the need for one, though I have been known to do Dark Moon Rituals when it’s time to break up stagnant energy. Is it time for that?

I’ll meditate on the idea.

It was awesome that I could talk to the boyfriend about this, as we work from different religious paradigms. But, he is very open minded and had some questions for me. We then moved on to the topic of energy play. Which he totally does without knowing how he does it. That will be a topic for another day.
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Spirituality

I find that I’m missing my spiritual life. I’m craving it again and not sure what to do about it.

I see my altar to my right. Kwan Yin, the beautiful dragon that my husband bought me for my birthday a couple of years ago, stones from our trip to Mexico, Las Vegas and the Appalacian Trail, plus a print of the tattoo that is on my back of a Phoenix. Beautiful.

I miss kneeling in front of the altar. I miss doing my cleansing ritual in the shower each morning. I miss doing ritual.

I want to start participating in Ritual BDSM again.

Paganism


But, I’m not. Obviously, it’s not a focus, not a priority and I’m not sure why. It used to be very important to me. But, I seem to have mellowed out. Things seem to not have form like they used to.

I need to give this some thought. Or get in touch in touch with Coral. She was the last one to stand in as Priestess for me. Wow. A year and a half ago.


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